Culturally “Awesome” Reflections #1: New York
Marie Gervais, PhD. Director www.global-leadership.ca
Business People Walking on Sidewalk, New York City
In reflecting on the past year’s work, some very wonderful intercultural experiences that have happened over the years came unbidden to my mind. I thought they might inspire others as much as they have me, so I decided to share them in a few posts. Here is the first one about cross-cultural exchanges in New York.
Not so long ago I was in New York for a conference at Columbia University and regularly took the subway to get back and forth. Almost every day I was touched by the kindness of New Yorkers who went out of their way to be helpful to others. One day in particular stands out in my mind. It started with me buying tickets for the subway in the early morning. One man bought his tickets and then turned to a homeless man who was sitting on the curb near the ticket dispenser and handed him a day pass for the train. “You might like to have some mobility today brother, here you go”, said the man as he casually handed over the ticket, smiled and kept on walking towards his destination. It struck me that New York had really changed since 9/11 and that perhaps disaster has some positive after effects.
In the afternoon when I was coming back from the conference events, a group of three Mexican musicians with guitars got on and began playing a most engaging song as the train lurched to a start. I was not only impressed with their playing, singing, outfits and initiative, I couldn’t believe they never once lost a beat or their footing with all the jerking of the train. I was so entranced by these musicians that when they passed around a hat for a silver collection, I immediately looked into my wallet to see what I had to give in thanks for this mini-concert. Alas I had no change and there was only one bill left of my conference money – $100 – a bit too big for a three-minute concert! A large black man who was standing next to me and saw my dismay immediately pulled out a five dollar bill from his own wallet, and put it into the hat, patting my shoulder with his other hand as he did. His comment to the musicians was, “This is for the little lady over here. She really likes your songs but she doesn’t have anything small at the moment.” I was so touched and thanked this generous man profusely telling him how impressed I was with New Yorker kindness. When I looked back towards the car, everyone was filling the musician’s hat, smiling and enjoying this exchange as they watched us.
Then that night I was with a cousin from Germany who was attending a different conference in New York at the same time as I was. We decided to take the train to visit my Haitian daughter-in-law’s father who lived in the Jamaica section of the city. The relationship is a bit complex because he is her biological father who didn’t know my daughter-in-law existed until a little while ago, but he and his other daughter were very happy to see us. He suggested we head to a local mall to pick up some food since we had not yet eaten. Once inside the mall, he hitched himself between my German cousin Stephie and me, and told his other daughter to hold on to one of us as well so we could be “matched”. As we walked through the mall, my daughter-in-law’s father seemed to know everyone there. He spoke to them in Creole and told them that his “international family” had come to visit because of his “surprise daughter”. Not my usual “mall” experience!
Later on when my cousin and I took the train back to the YMCA where we were staying, a group of laughing Hispanic and Black male youth sitting across from us began conversing – entirely in sign language – and telling each other jokes, but without a single sound. We realized they were deaf and watched them in wonder as they touched each other’s shoulders and motioned to get attention. Each youth told jokes with hands flying expressively through the air at lightning speed, and the whole group was reeling with laughter at each new punch line. A few stops later when they got off, my cousin looked at me and we both said at the same time, “I wish they could have stayed longer!” Later Stephie said to me when we got to our stop, “ In Germany we would never see this, I feel so fortunate to be here.” Hats off to New Yorkers for showing the world how to better live together!
